I have lived in the same home for over ten years.   During that decade I had a mail man who has delivered my mail regularly every day between 12:00PM and 12:20PM.   He is regular, consistent and reliable.  I cannot remember one time that my mail was late or not delivered properly.

What he did NOT do is bring the mail to my door, ring the doorbell, and when I answer tell me: “Bill, you have a letter here from one of your family members.  I need you to open this letter immediately and read it.  I must make sure you have read your mail, understand what you have read, and that you agree with this message before I can deliver any more mail down the street.”  If he were to do that, he would never finish his route, I would resent his pushiness, and I would not appreciate any mail that he delivered to me.

When we have messages to deliver to someone, I think we need to remember my mail man.  My job is to deliver those messages in a timely, non-threatening, deliberate manner and leave it up to the individual as to what they do with their mail.

When my mailman delivered my mail and I pick it up (in my timeframe) I do several things with my mail: (1) Some of it I wish he had never left therefore I drop it in the trash can on the way back into the house. (2) Some of this mail may be important but I don’t feel like reading it right now so I lay on the kitchen counter to open another time.  (3) Then there is that mail I just can’t wait to open so tear it open before I even get back to the house.   Some of my mail I like, some of it I am indifferent to, and then there is that mail I don’t want at all …  BUT … it is MY mail to open when I choose to open it … and to do with as I choose.   My mail man does not dictate what I do with my mail … he just delivers it and does an excellent job at that.

When you have those messages you need to deliver make sure that you deliver them appropriately and timely.  They need to be to the point, non-judgmental and once they are delivered, give the other person the respect to do what they want with their mail.   They may throw the mail right back at you, they may walk away and  lay it down to read another time, or they may immediately read the mail and respond favorably … but … that is their choice not yours.

Are you delivering your mail properly and then leaving it up to the receiver to do with it as they choose?

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About OnesimusConnection - "A Journey in Self Discovery"

Bill Nichols, is a Board Certified Christian Counselor, a Certified Professional Life Coach, a Certified Behavioral Counselor, a Certified Anger Management Professional and a member of NAMA – The National Anger Management Association. He has Certificates in “Sexual Addictions Counseling”, “Addictions and Recovery” and “Treating Compulsive Sexual Behavior”. He holds a Master of Religious Arts in Christian Counseling Degree, a Bachelor of Biblical Studies Degree and is a member of the AACC – American Association of Christian Counselors Bill has over twenty-five years’ experience in pastoral and professional Life Coaching & Counseling. He has organized and facilitated Anger Management Classes and directed Addictions Programs at various counseling centers in the Jacksonville area including The Salvation Army Adult Rehabilitation Center and The City Rescue Mission. Mr. Nichols has attended five different colleges and is a graduate of Nazarene Bible College in Colorado Springs, CO, International College of Bible Theology in Sikeston, MO and Logos Graduate School in Jacksonville, FL.
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